Thoughts from a Scot

I really wish that I was better at written English, not only would I be a better teacher, but this blog would be so much easier to start. I have already deleted my intro several times so I am going to stick with this one. Today I want to egotistically talk about myself, but at the same time try to give an understanding of what has kept me in Honduras for 2 years and what will see me coming back for a 3rd year next year. To start, I am going to talk a little about my past.

When I was in school I did pretty well on my exams without really putting in much effort. I left school with good results and managed to get in to a really good course at a really good university. Unfortunately, I wasn’t ready for the amount of freedom I had and although I passed my first 2 years without much hassle, I really did not have the drive or the passion to finish my degree and left because it was the easiest option and I didn’t want to think about the serious world of having a career, settling down etc.

After leaving, I went in to a series of jobs where I didn’t put in much effort and didn’t achieve anything significant, I just couldn’t get passionate about any of them and didn’t feel I wanted to improve myself to get better. Fortunately, I was able to save a bit of money and that allowed me to travel through Australia and New Zealand for a few years before returning to the UK and living in London for a few more and then heading to Laos to work with some amazing people and students. I loved living in new places but again I was a perennial under achiever, I never excelled at anything I did and I don’t think I helped anyone else along the way either. I really was just going through life without any direction and without any plan and although I was having a lot of fun, it could have been so much more.

On the other hand, I was fortunate enough to meet a few people along the way who I learned so much from and who helped me become a much better human than I was when I was younger. I am so grateful that those people came in to my life at various points and so happy that they are still there.

Ok, so that is my life story over, sorry if it is a little gloom and boring, I just needed to write it to set up how differently I feel now. I am still a massive underachiever in so many areas. I have pretty much no possessions, I don’t have a house, a car, a laptop, money or a decent wardrobe. I am still unable to cook, I am still unable to do standard repair jobs around a house or use Microsoft word effectively, BUTTTTTTT, finally some positivity, I have helped 27 kids improve their English and not just a little bit, in the most part, a massive bit.

I really don’t want to appear arrogant or that I think I am the world’s best teacher, I am far from that, but I can’t emphasise how proud I am of where the kids I teach are right now. When I started teaching these guys 18 months ago, I struggled massively (refer to my previous blog for info), I felt like I wasn’t helping them, I felt that I was letting them down massively and that I was failing like I had at every other job I ever had, but unlike other jobs, this time I didn’t give up. I worked hard every day to try and get better, I thought about these kids inside my head at least 12 hours a day and finally, I started to see it paying off. Now, after 18 months of hard work, they are getting unbelievably good at English.

I know that if they had another teacher it is more than possible that they could still be at the same level, but I still know that this is the greatest achievement of my life so far and the thing that I am most proud of up to this point. I still think about them all day every day, but now it is much less worrying and far more hope. I know that they are getting a far better education than I used to give them and I know that they are going to continue to develop and that I can help set them up for futures where they can fulfil the massive potential that they have. I really could not be prouder of them and they make me happy every day, even if they ask to go to the bathroom every 15 minutes and call me bald every time we write a sentence about Mr Andy.

For the above reasons, I don’t feel I can leave these guys just yet, I have so much more to give them and have so much more I can do to continue to improve myself as a teacher. I love that working hard here shows in such a clear and positive way. I can’t think of any other job I could be doing right now that could have such a potentially life changing effect on other people and the fact that it is for kids that I really do love makes it even better. To add to the good news, it is not just me doing this, the other teachers here are doing the exact same thing and working just as hard to help the young people they care so much about. CBS really does make a difference and I see it every day.

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I don’t really know how to transition from this, so in my last paragraph I just want to thank everyone here who has helped me get to this point. I know I have a reputation here of not taking advice, but I promise that even if I don’t show it initially or I am resistant to the advice, it is still put in the back of my head and more often than not I eventually realise it is good advice, so keep doing it : ). So, thank you to all the teachers who have helped me here and I mean everyone from 2 week volunteers to the people who have been with me for the whole 2 years, I really do appreciate all of you guys.

 The End

Mr Andy, 2nd Grade Teacher